It’s an overcast day
I’m leaving New York to go back to LA
Grateful to return in a couple of weeks
Home at summer solstice;
The season starts with my family
In the blink of an eye four months have gone by
It’s wild what’s transpired

My life is here
My things
Dojo
Base.

I’m in JFK and there’s this buzz in the air
Going someplace
The travel day gets me in the travel mood
God, I love an adventure
I want to travel while I’m young
See it all
But I don’t know if by doing so
I’m running
Am I giving it everything?
There’s shit I wanna accomplish

I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know

It’s rather unmanageable
Tying to understand
Hold onto
Grasp anything at all
I can’t grasp a thing
Catching my breath
Back west in the waves

This morning on the train
I felt so much life
So much love
Bursting from the seams of me
It’s summer
What do I want
I don’t know
Really don’t
Something is pushing me;
Telling me I’m meant to create
In partnership with existence

I’m in terminal five with some coffee by my side
A lack of something fierce on my mind
And that’s good
Pleasant
Even though at moments it
Feels like I’m gonna burst out of my skin
The way life touches me
The people and experiences
To express quells the storm

Summer solstice
Concluded my first season in NYC
I arrived in the cold
It didn’t last long
Soon my dojo was warmed with color and light
Plants found there way through cracks of me
I started to worry about them
But maybe I was just worried about me
Spring blew through the windows of my soul
The plants lost a few leaves
But they had to
To grow
I still don’t know how high I can go

Like a storm I came and went
Endless sodden East Coast nights
The brightest days
What did I learn
To be easier on me
That forced connection need not always be
When it feels right there’s a light
In your eye
Something dancing in the wind makes
Us come alive

I learned — at least I think — that all that matters
Is how you treat others
Opportunities to help come from passing back a ball
Lifting up a friend
Holding a hand as a stranger pushes from the floor
I see people as people
Life as life without something needed
To achieve or to reach
So tired of reaching
Unless I’m reaching for somebody who
Needs it

I’ve learned to stay true to myself
Still trying to discover who that is
When I’m tested
When I remain
That is how I know
My
Essence
Bedrock
Ocean of feeling

Spring in the rearview
Grateful I’m not leaving for good
I’ve felt that before and it hurts so much
Saying goodbye to people and places I love so much
Hands pressed together
Said goodbye to my space
Knowing I’ll return put a smile on my face

In the train I hurt for some reason I can’t explain
Because of love
Pouring from the sky

Yesterday was summer solstice
I met with friends
And listened to music in the garden
A celebration
Sunlight fell and I lay in the dirt
Where it all begins
I discover who I am in the summer